The 5 o'clock shadow, with dark eyes behind Clark Kent thick rimmed glasses. His business-casual dress wrapped around his muscular and of course, perfectly proportioned body. Not a curve out of place. " I'm literally talking to a photoshopped artificial Ken doll of a man. Hilarious", I thought to myself. But he had a scent of his own. Like an elusive pheromone that only fills and confuses your mind and hormones with his every motion. Ken dolls usually aren't my type. And Robert Downey Jr. lookalikes are also not my type. "My type?! Type? I shouldn't be having any kind of type". But I was. My mind was reeling with excuses to run as fast as I could, out the door, into my car and back to my safe and restless world. But it was like an intoxicating spell, the way he looked at me. I must've had my jaw on the floor because he tilted his perfectly set jaw to the right and cracked a brief smile. "Please sit down for me"....."uh...ok"....Like a lost deer in the headlights, I just did as I was told. I plopped down on another crazy sofa I was convinced was a recent prop on Moulin Rouge.
I mumbled, "Thank you for seeing me. I uh...." "You need to sleep". He finished my sentence as I tried not to nod off.
"I only really half-sleep, through the day and not at all at night. And believe me, I've tried everything. I'm going on about a year of this".
Has your husband offered any support, or is he part of the problem?"
"Um, how did you know I had a husband?"
"Well, unless your emergency contact on your paperwork here is a different 'husband', I'm pretty sure you have one", again with the half smile. I squirmed, trying not to smile as well.
"Oh, yeah". Oh my lord, really? How stupid and paranoid could I possibly appear right now?!
"Mrs. Soraya, we don't need to unload it all today, don't worry. We will get you sorted out. My methods are unconventional, but 100% satisfaction is guaranteed. My patients are well rested and thriving in new ways in their lives. See, I don't just treat insomnia. I am dedicated to lifestyle change as well. A renewing of the mind, thus greatly improving one's love life, work life, and over all sense of purpose and joy. The people who leave my office are fulfilled and revived. We want that for you. Don't we?".
"Yes,....we do". I could only make eye contact for a moment before dropping my head and smiling like a little junior high girl with a crush. I hated how my face would turn so vividly red, against my will. I hated it in school. I couldn't hide a crush. Everyone always knew what I was thinking. I would hide my face in a hooded sweatshirt and run to the bathroom...which isn't quite as easy as "sophisticated adult". "Stop it, stop it", I told myself. Too late. Awkward silence. My heart was pounding. Why? I guess "Ah, what the hell", was the name of my new game here. That game is always fun. At first. It is usually followed by some extremely painful lesson.
"I'm proud to say, I have developed my own personally compounded supplements that have grown to be wildly successful. Wonderfully consistent. For each of my patients. I would like you send you home with some samples of these to try. Although they have worked for all, I always proceed with caution on behalf of my new patients", he said. I don't know how else to describe his voice but warm melted dark chocolate. "Stop salivating, P", I reprimanded myself. I've never been hypnotized in my life, but I imagine it felt a little like this "unconventional" Dream Doctor appointment. I felt powerless to disagree. As if "no" was no longer in my vocabulary. "That sounds great. Thank you. Your ...front desk...girl maybe forgot to take a copy of my health insurance card. I guess I never gave her my information. I'll take care of th- ",
"No need. My office is certified to distribute. One of the perks of creating a 'miracle drug', as they call it", he laughed. She'll get you squared away up front, and schedule our next appointment, so we can get delve into your specific issues. Everyone is different. I know it seems a little backwards to put prescription before full assessment but I would like for you to trust me on this". I nodded, rather helplessly as I left the Moulin Rouge couch and went to shake his hand. "Thank you for seeing me. Looking forward to this", I stared at the ground as I walked toward the door. "Lovely to meet you, Mrs. Soraya". Damn. Even his hands were sexy. Yet, long and lanky, in a way. A powerful and perfectly warm handshake left me feeling such an electricity. And what the hell was that scent? It wasn't sweet or spicy. It wasn't anything. But I found myself breathing deeper just to catch one last taste of it. I blinked my way into the more well-lit front desk red velvet office and checked out with the Brazilian Amazon cleavage princess. She confirmed and took down my next appointment date. "I hope you enjoyed your visit, Mrs. Soraya. One moment please. "she clicked her designer python pumps into a tiny back room with a gold key ring clinking in her perfectly manicured hand. I couldn't see what she was doing, but I could tell she was unlocking some kind of little gold door or safe. It struck me as a bit of an Alice in Wonderland moment. She returned with a small a small red prescription bottle. Unmarked. She smiled her perfect pearls and practically sang to me, "One at night. Sleep tight!"